16 GAY PEOPLE'S CHRONICLE SEPTEMBER 3, 1993
AT RISK
Looking at oral sex and 'monogamous' relationships
by John Kennedy
AKRON BUREAU
Ohio has men in each city who assist in behavior change for gay and bisexual men. I enjoy my work doing this job in sunny Akron. It's great working with gay men, not just because of their smart fashion sense, but because gay men are at a much better place in regards to knowledge of HIV and AIDS. Most of our problems are with consistency, or in changing our behavior in the first place.
Of course, these guys think they know everything about sex. But I've never come across a man who knows it all. I might say, "What about oral sex," to which campy replies abound.
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"Is there a risk?" I continue.
New studies have linked transmission of HIV to performing oral sex on a man. These studies are new and few safer-sex materials have been printed with this information. I recommend nonlubricated condoms for oral sex. You can use flavorings on the condoms too. Do not use anything with oil. That's where people make mistakes. Chocolate syrup, peanut butter and whipped cream have oil. So stick with fruit topping, so to speak.
If you do not have a condom on handyou always should, but if you don't—then stay away from the tip and don't get semen or preseminal fluids into your mouth or cuts on your mouth. Óral-vaginal sex, it would
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seem, will offer the same risks. Although oral sex is not as risky as unprotected intercourse, it's probably time to look at this activity. We probably need to make some changes.
As for intercourse, we need to be consistent with our condom usage. Remember, pulling out before you ejaculate is not a safe-sex practice. Also, the top, or the insertive partner, is exposed during unprotected sex. The oil thing also is true for intercourse. Your lubricant must be waterbased, like K-Y, ForePlay, or Astroglide, and use a lot of it. Young men, men in relationships, and people under the influence of alcohol and drugs are more likely to "slip" and not use condoms.
Young men often do not perceive their risk. HIV is seen as a problem for older men. The reality is that most of the people I deal with are young men who are HIV positive-guys who were exposed in their early twenties or teens. These guys were socializ*ing in gay bars with openly gay men who often did not use condoms with them, because they don't perceive young men being at risk. Young men are also less likely to use condoms in their relationships.
Men of all ages give relationship status as the reason why they don't use condoms. Heterosexual men who have institutions and families to support them in their relationships still choose to be unfaithful. As much as 65 percent of heterosexual men are having sex outside of marriage. Research on gay men show that very few choose complete monogamy inside of a relationship.
I don't have issue with sexual options. It just doesn't make sense to me that everyone
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thinks that their partner is the exception. A study by the Health Issues Taskforce found many men who said that they were in a monogamous relationship, but also admitted to having sex with more than one partner. If people in a relationship aren't using condoms with each other, then they are less likely to use them with someone outside the relationship. Furthermore, how can we talk about this with the person we are supposed to be monogamous with? I say always use condoms for intercourse.
Use of alcohol and drugs is highly correlated with unsafe sex. Of people who are positive, most of them share how drugs or alcohol played a part in their exposure and the progression of HIV infection. Poppers are most highly correlated with unsafe sex problems. They can severly impair our judgement.
So, the problem lies with converting this vast area of knowledge about HIV into behavior change. Most of the people that we surveyed in Akron are practicing safer sex.
Unfortunately, they aren't doing it all of the time. Many resources are available to support you in your safer sex practices. I invite you to contact me at NorthEast Ohio Task Force on AIDS at 375-2000. Our hotline number is 375-AIDS.
[Or, contact John Beres at the Health Issues Taskforce in Cleveland, 621-0766; Rick Russell at the Youngstown Health Dept. AIDS Unit, 742-8796; or the Columbus AIDS Task Force, 488-2437.] ✓
John Kennedy is a risk reduction specialist for the Northeast Ohio Task Force on AIDS, in Akron.
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